Living in Florida can be seen as a series of trade-offs. For example, we have mild winters and lots of sunshine. We also have a lot of animals that should only be seen on the Discovery Channel. In the past year, while walking Charlie in my highly-populated suburban condo neighborhood, we have seen:
- several large turtles (cool)
- two bunnies (aww!)
- an otter (awwwwwww!)
- an alligator (….oh), and
- a cottonmouth snake (ACK and also Charlie tried to fight it)
Recently, a lot of spiders have been in the area. I know a few things about these spiders. I know they’re about the size of a silver dollar, and I know they like to spin big-ass webs from low tree branches to the ground. I also know…now…that when Charlie takes off after a lizard, he will not hesitate to drag me the hell through one of those webs.
It was ok, though. I handled it with dignity and grace and screaming.
I dropped his leash, clawed at my hair, ripped off my hoodie and (I’m not sure about this part) kind of smacked myself all over my face and shoulders. It seemed like I was clear, but I still had the creepy-crawlies all over, so I stopped at the next SUV I passed to check myself out in the window
After about 20 seconds, I realized there was nothing crawling on me.
At the same time, I ALSO realized there was a man sitting in the car. Staring back. At what was clearly a crazy person who had a Flashdance fit in the parking lot, then ran over to stare creepily at him through his window.
I’m lucky I didn’t get smacked with a car door.
2 comments:
Seriously laughing out loud. I wish I had seen this!
Ahahahahaha!
Listen, the Temporary Spider Crazies are nothing to be ashamed of.
Post a Comment